According to this press release I just got,

“The EcoFly is the first rappin’ recyclable, eco-conscious toothbrush for kids.  It has a musical timer featuring an original rap son…”

Let’s go beyond the phrase rappin’ recyclable toothbrush for a moment (if you can)… As you can see, there’s a typo in the second sentence – it should clearly say, “featuring an original rap song…”

Or SHOULD it?

I prefer to imagine the press release being read in the voice of, say, Jay-Z. Now read it again. “It features an original rap, son!”

There you have it – my press release of the day. It beat by miles the press release I received (twice!) where they twisted themselves into unbelievable rhetorical knots to compare their performance management software (whatever the hell that is) to the film Avatar. Better luck next time, flacks!

From genuine press releases received TODAY at ToyFare HQ!

“Can I put you in touch with Dr. Stoner and Ms. Weiner for a fun, poignant interview?”

“Join a young boy as he mimics the movements of a variety of construction vehicles in I Am a Backhoe…”

One of the weird things about being (nominally) in the media is the vast amount of press releases I receive every day that have absolutely nothing to do with anything I even vaguely report on. Today I received a press release that informed me:

“Your audience needs to know what a sex addict like Tiger Woods could be going through.”

Now, my first impression is to be insulted at the condescending tone of that statement, especially since they’re so incredibly off the mark. But you know what…maybe I’m wrong. So tell, me, audience? Do you need to know what a sex addict like Tiger Woods could be going through?